We didn't drown or kill each other.... just a lazy author ;)

Wow, I've really got to get better at updating things here.  Well we made it successfully a little over 2 weeks on the boat, and learned a lot.  Our intended 1 month was interrupted by an impromtu trip to see a friend and take in the 'Power to the Peaceful' concert in San Francisco ( Just HAD to go see our man Michael Franti!!) We did feel though that the 2 weeks had sufficiently answered the questions at hand.... could we handle living together in a small space, how would Logan handle it, and what were the main things that needed to be fixed in order to truly make it livable.

To sum it up, the space (though will definitely take some getting used to) is definitely doable and didn't bother me as much as I thought it might.  You kind of get into a groove.  The one saving grace was definitely was the beautiful weather we had and that the cockpit could be used as living space.  I loved the morning, sun shining down, reading, sipping coffee, or doing yoga.  So incredibly peaceful.  When winter comes it'll be a different story, but I think you'd just use different coping mechanisms (sign up for indoor activities for Logan so he can get the ants out of his pants... he's started walking now and is a force to be reckoned with.  God help me when he learns how to run!)  Using the gym more often, hanging out at friends houses. The rain never stopped us from getting out for runs and stuff but the little guy will need some space to stretch.  When it came to all of our stuff, we'll definitely have to be selective about what we bring on board... man that closet is small!!  But a few nice quality things and we'll be good to go.  I realized I really don't worry about what I'm wearing etc. until I'm around people who REALLY care, but luckily I'm old enough now to be comfortable with what I feel is important, instead of feeling bad about myself because I can't compete with the many facets of 'The Jones' out there.  A small storage space will be a must though for special family things / documents and such.

Logan of course did amazingly well.  It did take him some time to adjust to sleeping in the main salon in his fancy dancy berth, so a few nights w/ frequent waking but finally he got comfortable with his surroundings.  We made some black out clothes for the portholes that were letting way too much light in and they worked beautifully. I did win the 'Bad Mommy' award though when after a week of frequent wakings I was trying to let his 'work it out on his own' a bit.  But after 15 minutes and the screaming progressively got louder and louder  I thought maybe he had a nightmare or was scared because of the rain/wind storm we were having.  I FINALLY went to him, picked him up.... and he was soaking wet head to toe and freezing cold!  I hadn't checked the portholes (they were closed but unfortunately not tightened down enough) and his entire bed was soaked with rain water.  I felt so terrible.  We quickly changed him and he got a free ticket to sleep with his Mama for the rest of the night.  He settled down and was back asleep as soon as snuggled in next to me, but man did I feel horrible!  Other than that , and one good bonk he was a happy little clam.  He is an absolute monkey though and knows how to climb up the stairs in the companionway in a heartbeat.  We need to figure out something to keep him down, very difficult to do the dishes when he's trying jump IN the sink, or cook when he's up trying to stand on the counters.
So that leads us to the "must have's " list:

1.  We need a regular stove (we were using a Coleman 2 burner propane stove), that is gimbled and has those prongy things that keep pots on the stovetop.  I don't like to cook when there is no one to keep their eyes on Logan. I have nightmares of something falling on him and burning him.  So it makes it tricky when you have a crazy schedule in general w/ baby in tow and then not be able to cook/ fix meals when he is awake.  So much already has to be crammed into his nap times.

2. We need a working ice box/fridge. We were packing in 4 bags of ice a day.  We found our icebox was only efficient at barely cooling the veggies, and then had to use a big cooler to store any truly perishable items.  Gord is working on replacing it now and is almost finished.  I'll post some pics when he's done!

3. We will need some sort of protective covering for the winter.  Being able to use the cock pit as liveable/ useable space is absolutely invaluable when space is an issue.

4. A shower would be just divine, I guess technically I can use the marina showers but man it'd be REALLY nice.  Not to use on a daily basis but in case of dirty bird emergencies.  I had a stretch of 4 days where I was unable to take a shower (working out/ running in between days talk about smelly!)  I really tried to be resourceful, went to my house - city maintenance had turned off all water, went to gym - baby freaked out in childminding and had to go home to take a nap, hubby at work- no one to watch L while I'm in shower = one DIRTY Mama serving dinner to our guest after 4 days of no shower.  I know it was all a matter of circumstance and normally one of those options could have worked out, but for us with little ones, nap time is our saving grace and is usually our only time to take care of such things.  It's high on my list anyway!

So we both left the boat feeling like we just need to 'take the plunge' , that it is truly what we want and that we need to make it happen.  We had decided to work on projects this winter (both house and boat) to get them both ready.  We had vacilated a million times, do we rent , do we sell (now / later).  We're so excited about the new venture, but then it all seems a bit overwhelming when you actually look at the To Do list. It will be interesting to see what happens, we made our final decision to stay in the house for the winter, but we keep getting a call about an interested renter, so we've scheduled a meeting next week to see if we can meet each others needs, who knows maybe we'll be on the boat before you know it.

 I have to admit there are days I am ready to just sail away, and others I am paralyzed by fear,  doubt, and of the unknown.  So many questions, so many we'll never be able to answer unless we just do it.  It reminds me a lot of childbirth/ raising children, we try to plan plan plan for something that is unpredictable just so we can say we're prepared.  When in the end, we just need to let go, be fluid and trust in ourselves that we have the strength, the love and the courage to be all that our hearts yearns to be.

I stand in awe (or angst) of our own story  sometimes, feeling like I'm reading a novel, anxiously awaiting to devour the next page, or fearful of the struggles ahead, wondering what will make us 'finally take the plunge'. Well this next page I could have never imagined, but I think it is the final push.  We recently got news that one of our best friends was killed by a drunk driver.  This is a man who absolutely lived life to the fullest, devoured life and sat back with a smile, illuminated all that was good and beautiful.  He was someone you truly did just watch in awe just waiting to see the story unfold knowing of anyone HE would have an amazing story.  And he did, no day was taken for granted, he loved his friends without regard...  open arms, an open heart and a huge smile for all to see.  I have never been so close to such a tragic event, so broken hearted.  But I do feel as though his energy has been channeled back into the universe and to us, giving us that push.  Amongst all the sadness and heartache, there is a subtle sense of calm, I suddenly do not feel scared, attached or alone.  I want my story to be full of life, of challenge and engaging with all of those around me.  So that no matter when my story ends, it will be a life fulfilled.

Bry you will be in our every sparkling sunset, every full moon, and every breath we take ~ you are an inspiration and a beautiful light for all the world to see. It is your light that will illuminate our way.  Thank you for such a precious gift, we love you.